living underground in the real world

I love women, part sixty billion

 

Three points:

11029BowBike6493Web-1

1) Sock garters. I want! What are they called, stays or something? They are cool. This is from The Sartorialist, and I can’t figure out how to link to the actual post, so I will just link to the site. How cute is this girl? I sort of have a massive crush on her for some reason today. (Full disclosure: I always have a crush on urban bike grrrls, doesn’t everyone? Do I date myself by using the term “grrrls”? It’s still so apt, I will never let it go! It’s still my ringtone too!!)

2) I was in NYC a bit last week, and I realized I have a pretty major fetish for watching women in high heels (and, preferably, tights and short shorts) climb up out of the subway. I love the back of women’s legs as they climb stairs so much it almost causes me physical pain. The past few days were perfect heels + shorts + tights weather, and I sort of just wanted to sit on a bench and drink it all in for hours. I’m not someone who can pull off or would even want to wear such a combo (well, yeah, shorts and tights, yes. Heels, no.), maybe that’s why it gives me such deep pleasure?

3) I had a mini Facebook fight yesterday (what else is new?) and I wrote a pretty snotty response to someone who responded to my awesome status update of “Oh hey, I’ll be accepting “You were so right, I was so wrong” crow-eating comments anytime about Obama, by the way…I’m waiting…” (which was prompted by this). I was hoping the dude would respond with “that was mean” because I had the BEST RESPONSE: “to non-vegans and dudes, yep. I’ve never found a reason not to be.” (said someone was indeed a non-vegan dude).

And while I was sending him brain waves to write what I wanted,* I realized that I have like four dudes in my life (three on Facebook, one of whom I have never met) who I just can’t not be mean to. How horrible is that? I can just tell, even in the case of the one I’ve never met, exactly the type of dude they are—the kind that needs to be taken down a peg. It’s a horrible trait of mine that I can never not be the taker downer. Fuckin’ dudes. Why can’t they just leave me alone, so I am not forced to insult them?

Where are some nice calves I can look at to calm me down?

____

*There is something SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH MY LIFE. Yes, I know that. I need to get off Facebook, I know that too.

6 Responses to “I love women, part sixty billion”

  1. mel

    take ’em down. reading this blog makes me feel so sane. thank you.

    yours truly,
    a fellow ex-bloodroot-er. ( who never actually worked with you but heard selma and alyson talk so much good smack about you.)

    Reply
    • zoe p.

      Stays are for corsets!

      Seriously, they are. I think these are literally called garters. Or sock garters. I thought they might be gaiters, but they’re not. Well, these sort of are. The legwarmer part might be kind of a gaiter . . .

      Reply
  2. brittany

    zoe p. took care of you… she’s got all her accessories and structural components straight. however, dear god, please do not wear them. please, lagusta. please.

    ALSO… there’s something WRONG with compulsively insulting those people?! when you have idiot arrogants they oughta be able to handle being told they’re idiot arrogants. you’re doing a public service. thank you.

    Reply
  3. moomie!

    i have a crush on that girl, too, lagusta.
    BUT where is her helmet?
    why hipsters gotta forgo the helmet….i hate that more than picking up mcgee’s soft shits.

    Reply

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