First of all: FUCK YES. Oh, Jon Stewart!*
While watching this episode, I had a HUGE GIANT BRAINSTORM:
I am the liberal élite Fox News so loathes!
I embody every aspect of it, from the veganism to the anarchism to the brilliance to the heart full of care and concern for….well, everything. Because that’s what “liberal élite” means. That you are smart, and that you care. It’s time to reclaim the phrase.
(And just to piss off anti-French anti-intellectuals even more, I’m adding the accent aigu that really no one uses except The New Yorker. [Of course.])
Liberal = you care for things. (Well, you know that really I’m a radical, but we’ll put that aside for now.) Liberals believe that capitalism, in and of itself, is not enough to run a society and therefore government should function as a system of checks and balances on the natural corporate rapaciousness that capitalism, by definition, demands. Liberals believe that people should be free to decide how they live their lives, as long as they are not hurting other animals or other people. Liberals see no contradiction between those two believe because liberals are not idiots and can therefore see nuance.
Elite = you have standards, and believe that hard work and a good head on your shoulders means you should rise to the top.
Liberal élites, thus, believe that there should be no limits on what anyone can achieve, regardless of how you were brought up, how much money you have, what you believe, the color of your skin, or who or how you like to fuck.
Liberal élites believe in the infinite, ever-expanding possibility of the human race.
So, no matter what Christofascist racist homophobes (i.e., conservatives) say, stand loud and stand proud, my fellow liberal élites!
Now, you say (because I know you worry a lot about how my particular rant o’ the day squares with my previous screeds), Lagusta, yo, calm down. You’re not a liberal élite! You’re an anarchist!
Ah ha! I can be an anarchist élitist—totes. Elitism merely says that the coconut cream rises to the top, not that the bosses should own everything. Anarchism says that in order to achieve our full potential as humans, we must be, first of all, FREE. No contradiction there.
Liberal élite pride!!!
*I hope you don’t get the commercial for Axe body spray that I did, however, because that almost made me blow my fucking brains out.