Just three quickies before I re-enter the world of matzo toffee:
Oh wait, let’s make it two, and one I will post on the pro blog. OK. Good idea.
1) Can you tell I was feeling springy and good (albeit a bit blurry) today? Finally, it happened: a fantastic day!
I knew it would come along.
Met with Jasmine to discuss glorious custom lighting ideas for the shop; shipped out some bunnies and whatnot; bought, loaded, and unloaded a ton of flooring for the apartments in the building (OK, I could have lived without those hours, but whatever); had lunch with friends old and new; petted a puppy; cut some daffodils to bring inside; and sat in the sunshine reading Martha Stewart Living for half an hour, inhaling the springy air and feeling just as mentally stable as you please.
2) Oh, and this. This happened too:
Damn. Every time I think I think I don’t care about inside-baseball vegan-insider useless scandals, another one comes along and I go nuts reading about it and weighing in. I just took an hour out of a fast-paced day to jump into the fray, then I called my mom and we had fun rehashing it too—THE OUTRAGE!!! OH! I AM SO OUTRAGED!
Yeah, I am. But I also find THE OUTRAGE a little much.
My sweet pal Marla, who writes for them as a freelancer (and, full disclosure, once or twice has quoted me in an article in the mag. I feel like somewhere long ago she or someone else mentioned my chocos too…maybe not, I sincerely can’t remember—oh, and, more full disclosure: no less than three times in the past two years have their editors emailed me asking for free samples, which I always sent even though I suspected they don’t really get my chocolate, and obviously they didn’t, since I never received so much as a thank-you note.
Wait, now it seems like I don’t like them because they didn’t write about the chocolates. Ah, I don’t care how it seems. My chocolate isn’t aimed at their audience.), pointed out, quite justifiably, that the INSANE PILING-ON that is happening (I am very guilty of this, as I wrote a hilariously mean status about the whole thing) is not productive and takes time away from the vital work of vegans hating on non-vegans.
Or, vegans hating on other vegans because of our shoe choices (I just blocked a dude on FB because he was going around telling everyone I wasn’t vegan because of my 3 pairs of used leather shoes. Funnest quote: “You may THINK you’ve been vegan for 17 years, but…”).
Or, wait, was there something about animals we’re supposed to be focusing on, or something?
And wait, what? Lefties are tearing each other apart instead of focusing on true progressive change?
ANYWAY, here’s my problem: I subscribe to meaty food mags and I read meaty food blogs, so I’m obviously good at blocking out dead animals when getting my foodie news fix. (Also, two people bought me Grant Achatz’s book for my birthday, so there we go. The cat’s out of the bag that I like to read about non-vegan chefs).
But, if I paid money for a vegan magazine and photos of dead animals were in it, I would mos def find it to be a disgusting betrayal.
But! I’d never pay money for VegNews because the mag has never been my cup of tea. Jacob forced me to try to win one of their awards last year, but other than that I’ve been happy not to engage with the mainstream v-world (which they epitomize/define/shape/helped create), as, as I’ve talked about in this space often, vegans are not my target market.
(I’m a guerilla undercover pleasure provocateur, getting off on turning flesh-eaters into weak-kneed sycophants at the altar of my ethical edibles, my theobroma cacao, my politics I will not disavow in order to make classy-ass chow chow!
BUT! (Moving on from my amazing rapping skills which I bet you never even suspected, did you??
What’s that? You want another one? OK, here we go: My name is Lagusta! It rhymes with balabusta [NOT REALLY SO MUCH ACTUALLY]–that’s Yiddish yo! It means a pushy lady! [ok maybe this one needs some work, as it really only contains one rhyme which does not, in fact, rhyme at all. It would be better if I made a video of me rapping it at ya, but lord knows that is not going to happen.)
What offends me much, much, much more is the fact that their PHOTOS WERE NOT OF THEIR ACTUAL RECIPES! No reputable food mag would ever dare such a crap trick. I used to buy Gourmet ONLY for their photography (oh GOD, remember those annual summer produce issues? I don’t like the term “food porn,” but I could seriously rub one out to those dripping tomatoes and split watermelons, slick with…
phew. oh god. Watermelons. Is it getting hot in here? And also, did I just sort of come out to you [and myself]? Dripping/split/slick?)
One of the most disappointing events for a new cook is spending a night making a recipe that doesn’t turn out like the photo. Imagine if you made a VegNews recipe that didn’t look like the photo not only because the photo was actually of animal flesh, but also because it was of something else entirely? That does get my rage righteously roiling. To have so little respect for your own recipes truly disgusts me. Imagine if I sold chocolates with stock photos! (all those stock choco vulva photos…)
I’m sure the VegNews publishers are fine, ethical people who sincerely want to cheerlead veganism, and they have done a fine job of that through the years. But I have never supported them, and never will, because their brand of veganism—heavy on packaged crap and endless shit to buy, skinny white celebrities and mainstream animal welfare orgs (I did truly find Marla’s articles better than others, and I truly don’t think that’s just my friend bias talking. [I do, however, think my friends are generally better people than most.])—is not how I practice my veganism. Live and let live, I suppose.
OH THE IRONY.
Anyway, they’re a shit-ton better than Vegetarian Times, we can all agree on that!
PS: Update: My mom and I rehashed VegNewsGate tonight, and decided that the real problem is that VegNews was the Family Circle of the veganverse (or the O Magazine, pick your poison, either works), and what we really want is a New Yorker. Is it too much to ask for a smart vegan mag?
*I may or may not have had some caffeine today. Not as much as when I wrote that cupcake post or whatever the hell this is, but, if pressed, I wouldn’t exactly be able to deny that a small soy chai had not entered my possession somewhere between the unloading of thousands of pounds of flooring and the sitting in the sun-ing.