items of note. maybe.


What this is, is: a plate of sauteed spinach and roasted fingerling potatoes. With a few awful out of season tomatoes. Garnished for no conceivable reason with a few sliced scallion pieces. As an entree. In 2012. THIS EXISTS.


I’m hiding out in paradise for just a few more days, so will make this quick.

  • The thing mentioned in the thing below is finished, printed, and online! Take a peek, it’s a very good thing.
  • I made it so you can view my Hawaii photos, because if I was in a cold clime right now I’d want some tropical relief, too.
  • That New Yorker article on placebos is blowing my mind. (The fiction in that issue, however, is the first time I think I’ve ever skipped the fiction, like, ever. This secular anarchist atheist Jew can’t stand to read about Hasids, who knew? It actually literally gave me the creeps. Sad thing is, I think if I’d stuck with it I would have liked it, because the story was making the point I make all the time about Hasidic Jews…but I couldn’t.)
  • Do not buy the book A Day at elBulli unless you really, really want to be annoyed by pretentious chefs of the very worst kind—the insanely famous and lauded kind. Now I have to lug this 5 lb doorstop home.
  • I was going to write a hate-manifesto for a restaurant here today, but instead I’ll just copy my what I ranted about on another internet platform. Needless to say, I do not recommend Oasis in Kapa’a.

My oh my does this post make me out to be a ridiculously privileged annoying asshole with very little real world problems to worry about.

Which I am.

What this is, is: a photo I am too annoyed to even un-sideways of KALE, just KALE on a plate with some avocado sauce that was OK and some other sauce that was OK on the side and maybe some mac nuts or something on the side too. JUST A HEAP OF KALE. IS THIS A NATURAL GOURMET COOKERY SCHOOL FRIDAY NIGHT DINNER FINAL EXAM FOR CHEF TRAINING STUDENTS CIRCA 1990? If so I'd give it a C-. Dollops of sauce with a spoon drawn through them for a jaunty effect: you're doing it wrong. It shouldn't look like someone already took a spoonful of the sauce. Also: grilled kale: you're doing it wrong. It shouldn't be burnt and dry because you didn't add enough oil to it. Also: feeding vegans: you're doing to so insanely wrong I want to cry.


10 Responses to “items of note. maybe.”

  1. adriennefriend

    That second picture is so insanely ugly and unappetizing that I want to cry. :-(

    Here’s my first world problem of the day: last time I had to update my address with Conde Nast the person who answered the phone was a total ass, and when I had to update my address with the New York Review of Books, it was totally pleasant. TODAY when I had to update my subscriptions Conde Nast was lovely and NYRB was awful.

    • lagusta

      Yeah! Read it! And I’ll read the fiction. The thing is, I could tell it was going in a good direction, but after living in Teaneck, NJ for 4 years I just couldn’t take even the beginning.

  2. Stephanie

    I hear your angst. Why is it so hard for otherwise creative kitchen-types to create a good vegan entree? Or anything else? Why does the label “vegan” become scary? My honey and I spent a lovely anniversary day at an upstate spa that had a cafe with a stellar reputation. I, too, called ahead to let them know that there would be two vegans there for lunch on that particular day. I, too, was greeted by a hostess who thought I was insane for thinking I could call ahead and expect something that might not be on the printed menu. And I was served a decent, though not very creative, tasting plate which I can’t even remember now, except I do remember the salad with goat cheese served to me and when I returned it since it had GOAT CHEESE on it, I was reserved the SAME SALAD which someone had tried to pick out the obvious GOAT CHEESE but left some mid-way towards the bottom… Sigh! Needless to say, I don’t go out much for dinner – it is usually a total disappointment!!

    • lagusta

      Ooh, you must dish on the name! Just give me the initials!
      That “remove the cheese” trick sure gets old. You ALWAYS find the cheese.

      • Stephanie

        Oh, I don’t know if a single initial would give it away… It was Mirbeau in Skaneatles and it was almost 5 years ago. Looking at their web page just now, they have changed their dining options around a bit (including that disgusting trend of highlighting their use of locally-raised dead animals because they are “concerned about your health” – blech!).

  3. Jordan

    Can I ask how much you paid? These people lack creativity and passion. Four days notice? You should have had some sort of Tempeh with grilled pineapple and some GOD DAMN RESPECT!

  4. lagusta

    Here’s the worst thing, Jordan: it was a treat from a pal! I’m a terrible treatee. But he was super annoyed, too. I have a feeling that entree was over $15, most likely around $18-$20. And my ultra-watery margarita (in a pint glass!!!) was probably $10 or something.

  5. Vee

    That’s just lazy. If you’d said vegetarian, they would have just loaded your plate with dairy, right? I hate how the most vegetarian friendly restaurants suddenly draw a blank when asked to eliminate animal products altogether. How pathetic. If a college student with no culinary training whatsoever can manage to come up with interesting, delicious vegan meals, a chef has no excuse. And you’d think that they’d have some pride in their establishment as well – as a business, they’re providing a shitty service. Or alternatively a really really good service depending on who the client is. That’s a bit segregationist. And dumb.


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